We all love Christmas music. But let's admit it - with every pop singer ever to grace this earth releasing a Christmas album, some Christmas music is absolutely terrible. Lucky for you, I've scoured near and far to weed out the bad and find the good. Here are my five favorite Christmas albums, that I can pretty much listen to straight through, from start to finish.
You know how when you've listened to a CD too much, it gets all scratched up from too many plays and then doesn't play anymore? Well, that happened to this CD. After about a year. Because I listened to it year-round. I love MercyMe's music, but their Christmas album is absolutely amazing. They take many classic Christmas tunes and introduce more upbeat tempos ("Silent Night"), a different musical tune ("Gloria"), spine-tingling harmonies ("O Holy Night"), and/or beautiful instrumentals ("It Came Upon a Midnight Clear", "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen", "Little Drummer Boy"). Don't miss their heart-warming original - "Joseph's Lullaby" - either. Actually, you should probably just start on track one and listen the whole way through.
Amy Grant has many Christmas albums out there, and I have to admit that I haven't listened to them all, because I love this one so much. I grew up listening to this album, making sure to listen to "The Night Before Christmas" on repeat on Christmas Eve. Other note-worthy songs include "Breath of Heaven (Mary's Song)" (perfect for Advent and even year-round!), "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year", and "Joy to the World/For Unto Us a Child is Born".
Like most of their albums, Relient K's Christmas album is very punny, which means it's especially fun for the young and young-at-heart. Many of your classic favorites are also given a fun and upbeat spin, a la Relient K style. My personal favorites include "Angels We Have Heard on High", "We Wish You a Merry Christmas", and "In Like a Lion (Always Winter)" (perfect for Advent).
This is a classic, people. Just click play and sit back and soak up the joy of the season. I especially love the always wonderful "White Christmas", the fun and upbeat "Jingle Bells", the classic "It's Beginning to Look Like Christmas", and the timber tones of "Silver Bells".
I've tended to notice that Christian artists make really great Christmas albums. Casting Crowns' album is no different. "I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day", "O Come All Ye Faithful", and "Joy to the World" are some of my favorites that are on repeat, while "Christmas Offering" and the gorgeously instrumental "O Come, O Come Emmanuel" may soon join the constant-repeat list.
What are your favorite Christmas albums?
Tell me now so I can soak up all their goodness this season!
*Links provided are for Amazon Smile - select your favorite charity and start shopping!
This song is especially perfect for Lent. As we all know, Lent can be an especially... trying time. Spiritually. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally.
But it is also a great time to find our center and remind ourselves that we are just a dry, barren, desert soul without God. It's a time to remember that we should always be running towards God.
I love You Lord
But I want to love You more
I need You God
But I want to need You more
I'm lost without
Your creative spark in me
I'm dead inside
Unless Your resurrection sings
I'm desperate for a desperate heart
I'm reaching out, I'm reaching
All that I am is dry bones
Without You Lord, a desert soul
I am broken but running
Towards You God, You make me whole
You are exactly what we need
Only You can satisfy
That being said, we should always be running towards God, not just during Lent. So put on your running shoes, blast this song on your iPod, and let's get going.
You may be wondering, Yes, this is great, I like this song too... BUT WHO SUGGESTED THIS SONG TO YOU AND IS THE OH-SO-LUCKY WINNER OF THE DELICIOUS BAKED GOODS?!?
Well, I heard about Rend Collective Experiment just before Lent started, when the extremely talented Audrey Assad posted about them on Facebook and Twitter. Because Audrey and I are BFF+Ever, I trusted her and gave them a listen and was hooked like a fish. I bought their album right away, and haven't looked back since.
So, congratulations Audrey, you win delicious homemade baked goods!
Think she'd mind sending me her address so I can ship them to her?
Too creepy?
Some other great songs that were close in the running...
Here With Me by MercyMe
I Will Wait by Mumford & Sons
Blessed Are the Ones by Audrey Assad
Meant to Live by Switchfoot
The Spirit and the Bride by Matt Maher
OK, now it's your turn again. What should have made the list, but didn't this time around?
Feel free to make your case if you think you should have been the lucky ducky winner.
Welcome back ladies, we've missed writing with you!
Our Heavenly Father... longs to convince us of his passionate love for each one of us, that relentless mercy which calls - and enables - us to share his own divine life, that fiery outpouring of love...Let's face it, we humans really don't want God to love us that much. It's simply too demanding. Obedience is one thing, but this sort of love clearly calls for more than keeping commandments. It calls for nothing less than total self-donation. That might not be a difficult job for the three infinite Persons of the Trinity, but for creatures like us, such love is a summons to martyrdom. This invitation requires much more suffering and self-denial than simply giving up chocolate for Lent. It demands nothing less than a constant dying to self.
-Scott Hahn, A Father Who Keeps His Promises, page 18
When I was "growing up" (as in, through college!), I never really took the "Give up something for Lent" thing very seriously.
That wasn't completely honest. I never really took Lent seriously.
That wasn't completely honest either. I never really took the whole "Living the Catholic Faith" thing seriously.
Anyway, I thought Lent was just another part of the Church year where you just chug-chug-chugged along until you got to wear your brand new dress at Easter.
I would sometimes "give up" something for Lent, but I hardly ever stuck to it. Or if I did, I found ways to master my way around it.
Like that time I gave up dessert... I started eating my cake before dinner. Appetizers, anyone? I get points for creativity, right?
Thankfully, I've grown to learn that Lent is not just another part of the Church year. It is the Church year.
It is through Lent that we truly live out the Christian life. Suffering and sacrifice and wandering in the spiritual desert with Christ? Yes. We are all called to walk the way of the Cross.
But like at the end of Lent, we are also told that through our suffering and sacrifice and spiritual dryness, we will encounter joy and love through the Cross and ultimately with the Resurrection.
We aren't called to just chug through Lent for 40 days. We are called to liveit... each and every day. Yes, the entire year! Since I started taking Lent - and, well, this whole living Catholic thing - seriously, sacrifice and suffering for me has been focused on giving up attachments that are in some way keeping me from giving a complete gift of self to God and others. It's about giving up things that distract me and get in the way of being who I am called to be.
Here's my Lenten routine...
Give up chocolate. Chocolate and I have a very... special relationship.
... and that's putting it mildly! All I can say is, Bless the poor souls who get to put up with me when I go all cold turkey without my chocolate.
Chocolate is an addiction for me. I crave it. I need it. I have torn apart my kitchen looking for it before. I don't know what it is, but there are times that it controls me. And after I give into the craving, I always feel a little bit sad, because I didn't have the self-control to say no!
So by giving it up for Lent, I am working on my self-control, which Lord knows is something I need... desperately. And not just with chocolate.
Give up the drinks.I love milk. I enjoy juice. I like a beer every now and then. I hate water. Hate it. It's so... boring! Seriously, something that is that good for you should at least have a taste!
So, for Lent I'm giving up all drinks except for water (and I make an exception for milk on my cereal... girl needs her multi-grain Cheerios, mkay?!).
In addition to giving up chocolate, only drinking water helps me put some focus on not just my spiritual health, but also my physical health. My body is a temple for the Holy Spirit! After I receive the Eucharist, I am physically carrying Christ to the world! I know that I sometimes put so much effort into my spiritual workout that I just put my body to the side, but I have to remember that this body is a gift from God, and needs nurtured just like everything else.
Listen only to Christian music. I wrote about how I love my little musical guilty pleasures. I actually don't really find anything wrong with non-Christian music, but I do find something wrong with how I let it affect me sometimes.
I love love love music and how it speaks to me, but there are times when my guilty pleasures feed into my state of life - I'm talking loneliness, impatience, and lack of trust. Listening to a lot of this music (ahem, maybe mostly TSwizzle Diggity Dawg) brings all of these emotions to the forefront - even when I was feeling perfectly fine before! - and just lets that longing for wanting to be loved and cared for by another surface and bubble over. And this is when the emotional chastity goes out the door and the pity party begins.
By listening only to Christian music (or music that reminds me of God), it helps me shift that desire for another to my longing for The Other, as in God. It leads my heart and mind to be more focused in prayer, and I have to say that of all the things I've ever sacrificed, this has been the most fruitful for me in building a stronger spiritual life. It also reminds me why I struggle so much with loneliness, impatience, and lack of trust - because the desire I have for loving another is a good thing! But it also reminds me that I have to have patience, which again, Lord knows I need!
~*~
Some of you might be thinking, "Uh Liesl, did you not read your own book excerpt that you put at the beginning? Lent is more than just giving up chocolate!" And you would be right!
So, what do we do with all these little sufferings and sacrifices? OFFER IT UP!
This is a concept that evaded me until a couple of years ago, but think about it... What did Christ do? Whine that he had to die on the Cross? H--- to the NO!
He offered it up for each and every one of us, in atonement for our sins. We are invited to join with his sacrifice by offering up our sacrificial splinters to be a part of his cross.
I offer up each of my sacrifices and sufferings for something very close to my heart, each and every time. But you can offer it up for anyone or anything you want - just don't waste your suffering!
... Even if you are just suffering over not being able to chomp on a piece of chocolate!
I know that most of us aren't ready for this discussion, but we can’t go on ignoring the elephant in the room.
Not really sure how you could ignore this cute wittle itty bitty baby ewephant!
Wook at him pwaying wif the baby birds!
What you can ignore is how annoying it was to type that baby waby voice. Please never again.
Lent begins in two weeks.
I know, I know! We’re in denial. “We just took down the Christmas decor!”we all say!
“We also enjoy using the royal 'we'” we all also say!
But we need to bring it up because I need your help. Here cometh my plea.
One of the things I do for Lent is listen only to Christian music. In the car. Working out. While I bake. When I should be attempting to get out of bed in the morning. Those kinds of things.
This means I give up my guilty pleasures that include but are not limited to: Yellowcard and Maroon 5 and Sara B and TSwizzle Dawg and Key-$-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaaa-ha-ha-ha-ha and all that rapmusic I listen to on a daily basis. I’ve gained a lot spiritually from doing this in the past (which I then sometimes tend to lose when I pick up the Queen of Emotional Chastity’s music again [TSwizzle, in case you were confuzzled{I think I lost my parenthesis}]).
Anyway, so I’m asking for your help. I need song recommendations! Songs that are great for morning car rides or getting pumped up for a workout or waking up in the morning or diving deeper into prayer. I need some great Christian music to listen to during Lent and beyond!
If my playlist of choice helps you understand a bit of what I like, steer that-a way. I can be kind of picky when it comes to music, especially Christian music. I like good and complex-ish lyrics (i.e. I look for a bit more than “God, You are so awesome!!!!!!”), intricate harmonies, and cool instrumental things happening in the background. I don’t usually listen to most of the “Praise and Worship” music out there, so Christian radio is usually a no-go for me.
I’m even willing to allow songs on my playlist that remind me of God or make me want to pray, even if they aren’t actually about God (or are they secretly about God, hmmmmmm...?).
Example:We FoundLove by Rihanna Counter-Example:State of Grace by Taylor Swift (I'm kind of in a relationship with this song right now... buuuuuuut, contrary to what the title suggests, this song is not about the state of your soul if you plan on receiving communion, or how awesome your life is after you go to confession. I know! I was shocked too!)
So, sendeth forth your ideas. Please make sure that your email address is linked to your comment (here’s how to do it) in case I need to follow up with you... which would happen if a) I love your suggestion and want more or b) I hate your suggestion and want to heckle you every day.
In exchange, I’m offering a littleprize. Yes, before you ask, it is more than the coveted award of "Liesl's Favorite Person of the Day!", although I think that should be enough incentive...
If one of the songs that you suggest becomes my #1 favorite song of this Lenten season, then I will send you a box of personally made by me baked goods. Yummity yum yum. To be kind of scientific, I will go by the number of plays a song gets on my iPod (fair, right?). And if a song that I picked is the most listened to... well, then I will bake myself some chocolate deliciousness... after Easter.
Let the games begin. And may the iPod odds be ever in your favor.
...finally finding a job with some help from my favorite saintly beau, feeling like I'm where I'm supposed to be, and having a great work schedule where I can still enjoy those days where all I want to do is just have a pajama day...
... healing from the rejections of life with a dash of prayer, humor, TSwizzle, and sarcasm...
... and whether we've already met or if we're still wandering around looking for each other, just stop putzing around and call me, maybe?
(I had to fit in the bestest song of 2012 somehow!)
... having way.too.much.FUN...
alright... maybe not that kind of fun!
... and being reminded over and over again that even in the struggles and sufferings present in life, that I am still known intimately, loved deeply, and so blessed by God!
Do you ever listen to a song on pop radio and just instantly think, "This song is totally talking about my man, Jesus!"
Nope? Just me?
Well, I know this song is actually about drugs and sex and unhealthy relationships, but from pretty much the first time I heard it, all I could picture in my mind was Jesus on the cross.
The more I've listened to it, the more and more I picture the whole song talking about the life of Christ, and how we are just searching and yearning for his love.
So, what follows is as close as I can get to show you all what I picture in my mind when I listen to this song, which - crazy as it seems - I use to pray.
**I've been working on this post for awhile to find all the right images, and now in light of the school shootings that happened last week, it seems even more fitting. Despite how tragic our world can be, we have to always remember that there is no tragedy where we cannot still find Love, there is no place that is completely hopeless because God is always there in our suffering. May those who suffer and cry out for hope feel God's presence, and may we all come to know and experience Christ's undying love that he has shown to each of us on the Cross.**
I've been feeling the oh-so-sweet sting of singleness a bit more than usual lately. Tonight at Mass, I was feeling down about being alone, and I just looked up at the crucifix. I asked Jesus to help give me the peace and happiness of belonging to him and him alone for right now.* I asked him to send me a good and faithful man when the time is right; a man who seeks God and ends up finding me, too (package deal!). I asked him to woo my heart (because apparently dying on the cross for me hasn't been enough to convince me that he loves me) to help me fall even more in love with him.
As I was driving home, I was listening to some of my favorite music in the car, and I thought, "I wish some guy would sing this song to me..." And then it hit me that I have Someone even better - Jesus singing those songs to me!
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Jesus knows how to woo a lady.
Here are just a few of the songs that I pictured Jesus singing to me tonight. I hope you too can feel Jesus working to romance your heart a little bit during this Easter feast!
When do you most feel Jesus working hard to win you over?
*Yes, St. Joe is still my beau, for those of you who are wondering. But I'm not cheating or anything because St. Joe is totally cool with Jesus being my boyfriend. I know this because 1.) St. Joe is the man, and 2.) He was totally cool with Mary being the spouse of the Holy Spirit. He's just not the jealous type! Plus, whenever he is beau-arific with me, he's really just pointing me closer to Jesus anyway.
I believe that Audrey Assad described this song as a "love song", but when heard this song for the first time, all I could think about was my spiritual dry spell. How cold and dark and lonely it can be sometimes, but also the hope I have that so much good will come of it.
I think my favorite part in this song is "What if the seasons help us realize?/Some things are only proven over time." Sometimes we don't understand God's reasoning or timing, but the different seasons we go through in our spiritual lives can bear so much fruit. I wanted to share this song with you all, and I hope you check out her latest album, Heart.
What if we find ourselves beneath the snow? Our warmest words all frozen in our throats And all we feel is left out in the cold You and I
What if the days grow short and lose their light? What if the coals burn black and the embers die? And we can't find each other in the night? You and I
Even the winter won't last forever We'll see the morning; we'll feel the sun We'll wake up in April ready and able Holding the seeds and the soil Of our love Of our love
What if the ice we tread is just too thin? What if we can't escape the squall we're in What if our hearts of stone are permanent? You and I You and I
Even the winter won't last forever
We'll see the morning; we'll feel the sun
We'll wake up in April ready and able
Holding the seeds and the soil
Of our love
Of our love
What if the spring comes soon and we're surprised?
What if the seasons help us realize?
Some things are only proven over time
Even the winter won't last forever
We'll see the morning; we'll feel the sun
We'll wake up in April ready and able
Holding the seeds and the soil
Even the darkness cannot disarm us We'll see the morning, we'll feel the sun We'll break up the Earth 'cause we know that it's worth it Sowing the seeds in the soil Of our love Of our love Of our love Of our love
I have been playing with a community band since I moved to the DC area. Part of our service to the community is to play concerts at Honor Flight arrivals, summer parks, retirement communities, and military remembrance days in the city. As part of this, we almost always salute the military by playing an Armed Forces Salute. Whenever we play this piece, we invite members of the audience who have served to stand and be recognized when their branch's tune starts to play. We honor the United States Air Force, Army, Marines, Navy, and Coast Guard, and there are always at least a few men and women who stand for each salute.
More than water police.
It's seeing the veterans stand so proudly, yet humbly, that always gets me choked up. Despite our country's many shortfalls, we are so blessed to live in a society where people are willing to sacrifice their lives for the good of each of us and others throughout the world.
I'd like to say that I've always recognized the great importance of all of our branches of the military, but this is not the case. I've always had a basic understanding of the missions of each of the combat-oriented branches (Air Force, Army, Marines, and Navy) and respected their service and sacrifice during times of war, but I have to admit that whenever the Coast Guard song began to play, I'd wonder in my head, What does the Coast Guard even do? Aren't they like the water police?
I like to think that my innocent naivete is adorable, but I think that only passes when you're six years old.
Then I came across a great movie called The Guardian, which really helped me to learn more about the sacrifices that our men and women in the Coast Guard make each day.
Definitely not one of the reasons I
enjoyed this movie...
This movie, starring Kevin Costner and Ashton Kutcher, is about the Coast Guard Rescue Swimmers, who live by the motto "So others may live." Ben Randall (Costner) is a legendary rescue swimmer that is asked to train new recruits after suffering a tragedy in the field. There, he encounters the young (and only slightly attractive) Jake Fischer (Kutcher), who first appears to be more interested in breaking records than in saving lives, but he actually has deeper reasons for joining the USCG. Not only does this story follow how these characters deal with suffering loss and guilt, but it provides a perspective of the intense training required to become a rescue swimmer. Many of the extras are actual rescue swimmers, as the film worked closely with the USCG to try to accurately portray the lives of these men and women (Kutcher actually went through the training himself so he could be physically fit enough for filming). The bonus features include interviews with many rescue swimmers and their families, who detail the challenges they face but also the rewards they find in their calling.
I enjoyed this movie for many reasons. Not only was it an entertaining film, but it really helped me to learn more about the Coast Guard. Most importantly, I think it also brought up some great themes.
We often forget the importance and loving quality of sacrifice, except for the occasional "say thanks to our military" days and the times we really reflect on the Cross. One of the commanding officers tells the new recruits in the movie, "You get the chance to save lives - and there is no greater calling in the world than that."
No greater calling.
I know it's just a movie, but many of the men and women in our military just seem to get it. There is no greater calling in the world than to love one another, and that sometimes means laying down one's life to save the life of another (John 15:13). The movie begins and ends with a similar quote that also ties into this theme:
There is a legend of a man who lives beneath the sea. He is a fisher of men, a last hope for all those who've been left behind. He is know as the Guardian.
The real Fisher of Men is not a legend, but a real, true, actual, living last hope for all those that have been left behind. He is the Guardian of our souls, helping to carry us up from the deep, dark, turbulent waters to the enlightened surface. This Guardian - Jesus Christ - died so that others may live.
On this memorial for our Veterans, let's pause to thank those in the military who have served, especially those who have had to make great sacrifices so that others can live. Pray for those who need protection, as well as for those who protect us. Yet, let us also take a moment to remember the ultimate sacrifice that has been made so that all of us may have the chance to live in the glory of the Kingdom of Heaven forever.
Here's a little humor for your Tuesday morning to help you get through the week, as well as a little preview to some of the fun things that happened this past weekend.
Enjoy a little comedy from Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye from White Christmas... and if you haven't ever seen this movie - what are you waiting for?! Get on it!
Tony Rossi commented on His Eye is on the Sparrow and pointed out that Audrey Assad has a version of this song on her new Live from SoHo album. I haven't had a chance to get the album yet, as $7 is 1/5 of a tank of gas (if you're confused, see the above post for how I now think of money in terms of food and gas), but Matthew Robbins was kind enough to send me the embed code so I could share the video with all of you.
Enjoy this beautiful adaptation by Audrey Assad, called Sparrow:
I have always been frugal with my money. I have always tried to live within my means, only spending money that I actually have. I'm not even close to the level of extreme couponing (yet), but I hardly ever buy something that isn't on sale or if I don't have a coupon (and usually both!). I also like to take time to make larger financial decisions, so I will thoroughly research products before making a big purchase (and by "big" purchase, I'm talking more than $20... that's how frugal I can be).
I also am a big saver. I was raised in a household where a certain amount of any money I received, whether it was an allowance, a gift, or hard-earned money, was put into a special savings envelope. I eventually grew up into a savings account at the bank, but that's where I started. Thankfully, I saved enough money over the past few years that I could put a down payment on a house, buy a car, or put on a wedding - at least those are things I said I was saving up for.
This was all when I had a steady income, and could afford to be a bit frivolous with my money.
And then the time of no-job came about. Since my last substantial paycheck from graduate school, I've had to cut my costs enormously. I'm talking cutting my credit card bill in half - which is not an easy feat. Despite being frugal with my money, I do like to shop the sales. So I had to make some drastic changes. No shopping, unless I absolutely need something. No eating out, which I used to do multiple times a week (I'm a single gal, it's tough cooking for one!). Only travel somewhere when necessary, and combine my trips when I can in order to save on gasoline expenses.
And I was successful. I cut my credit card bill in half for three months.
And then my roommate decided to move out. Hello, doubling the rent.
Don't let him get your bank account number!
All that money I had been saving up for something great suddenly began to quickly vanish before my eyes. It's like He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named broke into my Gringotts account to try to steal the Sorcerer's Stone!
So, I've been trying to budget even more. Thankfully, I have parents who help out where they can (hello, crazy doctor bills!), friends who feed me for free (even if it's free packages of cookies leftover from Girl Scout meetings), and a temporary position that is guaranteed for a couple of months. The pay for this job would be more than enough to get my through the coming months... if I didn't have these surprise additions I mentioned above added to my monthly expenses. Now, it basically covers my rent and internet bill, with a bit of spare change leftover for everything else.
So, I've started seeing dollar signs in terms of food and gasoline. Here's an example scenario:
Me: They withheld $35 in these taxes, when I filled out the tax exempt form... Someone else: It's not a big deal, it's $35...
Me: $35? That's my food budget for a week! The cost of gasoline in the car for ten days! $35 means I either don't eat for a week, or I take even more money out of my secret Gringotts vault. $35 is a big deal!
My new best friend.
Yes, I have turned into that much of a money pincher. $35 has even been known to be the cause of mini-breakdowns. I feel like the long lost Weasley cousin amongst the Harry Potters of the world, staring longingly at the mound of chocolate frogs that the young Harry Potter just bought from the trolley lady with his sack-full of galleons.
Because of these empty pockets, it also means I am unable to tithe with regular financial contributions to the church and select charities. I have tried to find ways to tithe with my time, but this has also proven difficult. Not many people want volunteers who can commit for the next week or so, and then go from there. Since I don't know when and where I'll get a job, that's about as far in advance as I can plan, and so as much as I want to be able to commit, I can't make any long-term commitments. Right now, my tithing of time consists of baking delectable treats for my weekly Bible study, playing with the concert band at community events once a month or so, and being a good listener to a friend in need. But it's not enough - it doesn't feel like enough.
All of this has me feeling like I'm unable to make decisions to go this way or that and a bit useless - I feel like I'm stuck in this constant state of stagnantly waiting.
For a job.
For a new, innovative way to make money (No, MetroExpress, I will not go to the "dancer" auditions that will make me $500 a night...).
For a way to volunteer my time without being required to give a long-term commitment.
I do not mean to give off the impression that I am so poor that I am driven to searching the couch cushions for spare change and on the verge of living in a cardboard box. I have many blessings in my life, including a substantial amount in my savings account that could allow me to live very frivolously, if I chose to do so. However, being me, I am finding it difficult to balance continuing to plan for the future and meeting my needs of today. This Sunday's epistle speaks a bit of knowing both abundance and need:
I know indeed how to live in humble circumstances; I know also how to live with abundance. In every circumstance and in all things I have learned the secret of being well fed and of going hungry, of living in abundance and of being in need. I have the strength for everything through him who empowers me...My God will fully supply whatever you need, in accord with his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. (Phillipians 4: 12-13, 19)
Sure, St. Paul. Your life was sooooo easy... at least, sometimes I feel like he leaves out a lot of details that really show how much of a struggle it can be. Did he just wake up each day completely trusting that God would provide for him, or did he struggle with it as we all tend to do? I'm not sure, but I wish I could better emulate St. Paul, who trusted God to care for all of his needs:
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat [or drink], or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they? Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span? Why are you anxious about clothes? Learn from the way the wild flowers grow. They do not work or spin. But I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was clothed like one of them. If God so clothes the grass of the field, which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow, will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith? So do not worry and say, ‘What are we to eat?’ or ‘What are we to drink?’ or ‘What are we to wear?’ All these things the pagans seek. Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom (of God) and his righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides. Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself. Sufficient for a day is its own evil." (Matthew 6:25-34)
Where are the wormies?!
Dependence on God is a constant theme throughout Scripture, but especially in the materialistic world in which we live today, it's not always easy to trust that God will care for our material needs. Sometimes, I feel like a sparrow flying around searching for worms, but the ground is too hard and rocky to find anything fulfilling.
It was about a year ago that I made the decision to switch from the PhD to the Master's program, thereby "leaving" graduate school by graduating this past May. I was scared. I had no idea what was in store for me, but I knew that I was not supposed to continue with school at this time in my life, and so I placed my complete trust in God, trusting that He would take care of me since I only sought to follow His lead.
Yet, every path I've felt like I've been led down since then has quickly and suddenly turned into nothing. I trust that all of these paths didn't work out because that's not where I am supposed to be, but I have to wonder why I am in this state of getting my hopes up, only to have them dashed away in a heartbeat. It's come to the point where I don't know where to go, because if all these previous paths have been wrong, then what (or whom) was I following?
I have not lost complete trust, because I still trust that in the long run, things will work out (as people constantly remind me). It just has been a long, uphill (both ways! in the snow! without my snow boots!) battle, and now that I've gotten to the point of becoming such a penny pincher that I worry what I'm going to do without $35, I'm not sure how much longer I can continue in whatever direction I am going. To say the least, wandering around feeling lost is a stressful burden to carry - physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
I just long to seek God and His will for me. I've been told that's all we need to say - Thy will be done - and maybe this all is His will. I just sometimes wish I knew what it meant, and where it will eventually lead.
Until then, I have to keep trying not to worry as much about tomorrow as I have been recently, but instead work to keep my heart constantly seeking Heaven. Since I trust that Christ always spoke the truth, I know that God has His eye on the sparrows in the sky as well as His eye on me.
... and if you haven't ever seen this movie - what are you waiting for?! Get on it! 
